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Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Whats Mac-happening lately?

Ok, the title is a little dumb, but someone I know always asks me this and when he says it it sounds sweet... as in Mac-Donalds...Mac-Chicken...ect ect ect blah blah blah.

Because the company I work for dont pay me NEAR enough to actually live on, I have to find extra jobs on the weekend to do. A good one is to do Promotions for companies. Like, this weekend I worked the whole weekend.

6hrs on Sat and 6hrs on Sun.

In 9 inch heels.

Yeah.

You can imagine how my feet were screaming at me to SIT DOWN!!! But, alas I could not as Sunsilk was paying me to stand and say : " If you buy any 2 Sunsilk products today, you get a free awesome, hot pink journal! "....with LOADS of enthiusiasm of course and a huge smile on my face...while all the while my feet are vowing never to speak to me again.

Ok, my feet dont actually speak, but you catch my drift Im sure.

Anyways, back to my point. When doing these promotions, you need to go for some basic training and wear what they tell you to wear. Normally its jeans and a company T-shirt and I can live with that. But, this time it was not.

This time it was this:




You cant see the heels in this pic, but believe me, they were there.

And I have the blisters to prove it.

Ok, next story.

You see this cat?


My terrible-excuses-for-human-beings-neighbours moved out and left this little darling behind. I know, its shocking. So, when he came begging at my door for food, I fed him.

And named him Max. Dont ask me why, but he just looked like a Max.

But, this guy can eat. Oh my word. I have gone through so much cat food and I can assure you, cat food isnt cheap. Especially not with the SA Rand falling so much. Its shocking. There has been a few times where I didnt have any cat food left and Max ate my left-overs. Not that he minded at all. Well, thats Max for you in a nutshell. Ok, not a nut shell really, but again, you kinda know what I mean?

Lastly...its this awesome womans birthday today. She is one of my best friends from school and she got married in July. I love her to bits and hope she has a day thats as amazing as she is.


Thats about all from me for now.

Oh, and Im getting flu.

Yay. Oh joy. Runny noses and sore throats really do it for me.

:)

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Cannot...stop....laughing......

I got this in an email and am still trying to stop the tears that are rolling down my cheeks, I am laughing so hard! Hope this brightens your day! :)


Hair Removal...
All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The Epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the wax. Read on.........
My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, and play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours:
'Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.' So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom.
It was one of those 'cold wax' kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off.
No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!)
So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees.
('Cold wax' yeah...right!) I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works!
OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.
With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it *was* a long strip) I inhale deeply and brace myself....RRRRIIIPPP!!!!
I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!
Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip. Another deep breath and RIPP! Everything is spinning and spotted. I think I may pass out...must stay conscious...must stay conscious.
Do I hear crashing drums??? Breathe, breathe...OK, back to normal.
I want to see my trophy - a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip. There's no hair on it. Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX???
Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip...it's not! I touch. I am touching wax.
I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake...remember my foot is still propped upon the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.
Sealed shut! My butt is sealed shut. Sealed shut!
I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself 'Please don't let me get the urge to poop, my head may pop off!' What can I do to melt the wax?
Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right???
*WRONG!!!!!!!*
I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit.
Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together, is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub...in scalding hot water, which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.
So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented myself to the porcelain!! God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!!
I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter 'So, my butt and hoo-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!'
There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located, 'Are we talking cheeks or hole or hoo-ha?'
She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.
YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.
While we go through various solutions, I resort to trying to scrape the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better than to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!!
By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm pretty sure I'm going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this event.
My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MY!!!!!!!
The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend. Its sooo painful, but I really don't care. 'IT WORKS!! It works!!'
I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair....THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......ALL OF IT!
So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point.
Next week I'm going to try hair color...

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Yes, this is post no 2 in one day...


Yes, I do realise that I normally only post once in every 2 weeks or so, but I just had to post this because I remembered it when I read this awesome womans blog. Hopefully you can bring yourself to read both posts and maybe, just maybe comment on both...

When I was little, probably about 8 or 9, my little sister, Colleen was about 6 or 7 and we were watching The Simpsons.

It was an episode where Abu, the immigrant in the series, was in fear of getting deported as he wasnt an American citizen.

The whole episode revolved around this.

Sometime during this, my adorable little sister starts looking very worried.

The longer the show went on and the closer Abu came to being deported, the more worried she got.

Eventually my dad then asked her what was wrong.

She looked up at him with her big worried eyes and asked:

(This one is a classic)

"Dad, are we American citizens?"

Needless to say we were almost rolling on the floor with laughter. She was so worried that we would also be deported.



Yes, she has yet to live this down.

PS: For those of you who dont know, I live in Africa. Not America. :)

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

I just don't know.

I suppose the title says it all.

I have had to tell the people at work, including my boss about my job on the cruise ship.

I didn't do it until last week because I wasn't sure of when I was going to join and didn't want to jeprodise my job or make him upset that I was leaving.

Then, he called me in and asked me what my plans were for next year as he needed to plan ahead, especially because the other lady I am a PA for is going on maternity leave at the end of Nov. So, I had to be honest and tell him that I wouldn't be here next year and that I would most probably be gone before this year is out.

It went alot better than I thought it would. He was happy for me and encouraged me to follow through with it as it was an amazing oppurtunity...blah blah blah...you get the picture. "You're young and free, do it now before you settle down"......

So, I have been feeling fine since then.

Today they interviewed (and found) the lady thats going to replace me.

I didnt think it would affect me as much as it did. Don't get me wrong, she is amazing. Tall, blonde and beautiful with a brain to boot. But, when she left, everyone carried on about how amazing she was. And pretty. And talented. And what an asset she was going to be. And how because she was married with a house ect, that she wouldn't up and leave after a short time.

That hurt.

I felt like standing on the desk and yelling : " The current employee is still in the room PEOPLE!"

I don't think they meant for it to hurt me as they are nice people who I get along with and who value me. But I really think that alot more tact could have been used. If they wanted to go on and on about her, couldnt they have waited till I was out the room?

Maybe Im being over emotional about it. But it hurt none the less.

She starts in November and I will probably still be here.

Not sure how I will be feeling then.

Will be sure to let you know.


Am I just being silly or do I have a right to feel like this?

Friday, October 3, 2008

Here I go again, oh oh, how can I resist you?



I was born in the wrong era.

Seriously.

I should have been born in the 1960's.

I would have had been able to see ABBA when they were still around and performing.

That would have been am...az...ing.

I am a huge ABBA fan and the last 2 weeks have been jam packed with them.

Last Tuesday we went to the Barnyard Theatre and watched Dancing Queen, which was a live performance, with tributes to ABBA and Queen. Wow. I sang and when they let us get up and dance...I shook what my mamma gave me.

Then, I have been DYING to go and see Mamma Mia at the cinema since it came out.

Ryan and I went and saw it last night.

...OH MY GOODNESS...

The whole cinema was singing to the songs and at the end the place actually broke out in clapping! I have never been to a movie where that happens before.

That has got to be in my top 3 movies of all times.

really.

no lies.

I came out there feeling like I was on the top of the world.

Singing...dancing...laughing to the car.

Ryan just laughed along with me.

Ok, maybe he laughed at me.

But thats ok, because I LOVED IT!!!

If you havent seen it.



GO...


GO NOW...





You still here?



I said go people! You will come out there a happier person because of it.





Sidenote: I think the ABBA people should pay me for this review.

Sidenote 2: I will be buying this this afternoon.